Respecting others the way they are is one, understanding one’s self is another. Yes, it’s hard to be you and hard to be true! It’s like the exchange that happens during he says-she says, but do you really think it’s all worth the debate? The popular window test that you probably know of showing the four dimensions of self indicates one side of us that seems to be blind even to ourselves, that ain’t new. So how do we find out this blind side of ours? My take is to accept how you are at the present. Accept, acknowledge and repeat. Everything is a cycle.
Many times I have been guilty of trying to be a people pleaser, I dislike conflict and at times find myself giving in at the expense of who I really am or rather shrugging it all off just to appease, but it never worked, I end up feeling miserable. Also, one thing I realized is to avoid having feelings that are too calloused to be able to feel and likewise being at peace with one’s self. I remember having read from Simon Sinek’s book the story of Dr. Seuss’ Snitches – it tells of a very basic human need – the need to belong. At times it may always not be rational but it’s something constant in all individuals. On the other hand, it’s also something we need because by feeling our way to belong we also get a good feel of those things that don’t belong. Get it? That’s gut feel- something deep inside us, something we cannot explain, something we cannot label always with reason. Fact is, some things just don’t fit in our lives.
Be yourself because an original is worth more than just being a copy.
With that, always be yourself and never try to hide who you are. The only shame is to have shame, which you always have a choice to stay away from. Always stand up for what you believe in, that’s an essential part of being you. It is what it is but do not fear to question if needed. Every mistake, every moment of weakness, every terrible thing that has happened to you – GROW FROM IT. The only way you can ever get the respect of others is when you show them that you respect yourself and most importantly – do your thing and never apologize for being you. You know how sometimes you try and find the meaning of life? The meaning it has in you? Well life IS about being yourself. Someone that is unlike everyone else. Someone only you can be. Someone only you can understand. Someone unique and out to strive to contribute to a greater good no matter how small the steps are because by being yourself you put something wonderful in the world that was not there before.
The best things in life unfold when you begin to realize what you really want and pursue it. As they say home is where the heart is and that home will always reside in being yourself and loving it.