As I sit on the couch facing the garden on this rainy Sunday afternoon I think of love and how it really turns lives around. On the background, music plays and I suddenly got caught up with the part of the song – “What about love, what about feelings, what about all the things that make life worth living. What about faith, what about trust, and tell me what about love.” Well I guess I’m really an old soul and sentimental by heart and I really have a thing to talk about that thing called love.
Have you ever loved? Have you ever questioned yourself if you are able to love? Or maybe the question should be – Are you afraid to love or admit that you have loved or still are? The answers are not for me to provide but I can only write of my two cents worth thoughts on it. Love is a ubiquitous feeling, it’s everywhere, it’s universal and central to all emotions. In a world where there is so much hate, no matter what peace efforts would be poured into it nothing will matter if there is no love to exert and sustain it. I have been asked quite a few times – I have loved but wasn’t loved in return, was it all worth it? – My answer would always be yes. You see love in itself is a beautiful risk to take, that thing of mind over heart is something I would always challenge with my own stand that is, heart over mind, I wouldn’t even think of pursuing something I didn’t love in the first place so that makes my heart walk first but my mind follows from behind.
Evan Sanders of The Better Man Project summed it pretty all up in his quote “She craved love, but was a slave to fear and spent a lifetime looking into a mirror perfecting the very mask that only stripped from her what she sought so desperately.” Craved, slave, fear and mask – these are keywords that struck me the most. There are some who crave for love, they look for it and get to be dependent on finding one to find themselves. There are some who are slaves to love, co-dependents – the firm believers. There are those who fear love, those who got hurt bad enough for them to choose to just shrug the whole thing called love in ceasefire mode; and there are those who wear a mask pretending to not love but deep inside the recesses of their heart, these are the ones that have/had loved deeply.
In case you foolishly forget… love will always exist.
All these faces of love were honed by what one has experienced or still is but no matter what, in the end all that makes perfect sense is they have loved. Surrender to the reality that love drives the determination in us to pursue the passion we have longed for. Needless to say that it doesn’t have to always involve the romantic kind of love, because on the other hand it may involve career or maybe even the smallest things in life – consider those that makes you happy, those that gives you an immense smile on your face whenever you think of it. Nothing is too trivial to be considered not categorized under love. Love teaches us lessons, allow me to share them with you –
Love means letting go of any expectations. Simply love “as is.” Love works together and yes it takes responsibility, it doesn’t take things personally. I spoke about letting go on an earlier blog post, so I’ll just make a quick mention here that love can also mean letting go- you would know already by now what I mean.
I am a firm believer of walk the talk, relating this to love, it definitely is not just all about words but more of action. Show the person you love them, never assume that they know. Go and show. Period.
Is it unconditional as they say it is? Yes. That is the risk I was talking about earlier, it’s accepting the other for how he or she is as a person, his or her whole totality, we all come in packages and baggages. Accept the packages; assist in the baggages. That’s the whole essence of the responsibility of loving. Love understands and accepts differences and true love respects that.
Lastly, never lose heart. Love is here to stay, everyone deserves it and in the end it always wins and finds its way to you.